Unfortunately, that is the sad truth about racing cars. Luckily, we still have other things to race. For instance; rats. Please be advised that the author in no way endorses the racing of rats.

At one time, perhaps the present, I was living or currently live in a town called Manlius. To get all the punchlines properly set up I am going to get all the important things you, the reader, needs to know out of the way right now. This is partially done in an effort to lose your interest.

Manlius is a middle upper class town in “Upstate New York”. It shares a public school district with a town called Fayetteville. Both towns are part of the Greater Syracuse Area.

Being located directly next to a town proudly displaying a badge of honor, or sign, providing readers with the knowledge that Fayetteville has been selected among the top 100 places in America to live, Manlius Town Council pushed themselves to come up with their own town identity. Surely the outcome was that of amazing minds. What better to out-do the cross town rivals?

An official letter was sent to the Fayetteville Town Council to announce the new threads Manlius was proudly wearing. It read something along the lines of, “Yeah, so your town is better to live in then ours? Well, we built a fountain with a SWAN POND! Yeah, SWANS!”

At that time, the Fayetteville Town Council fought back with a vengence. The town decided to put up several more signs boasting thier recent selection on the Top 100 places in America to live list.

Manlius residents were furious, they demanded retaliation. They would soon be shocked to see how far the Manlius Town Council would take this fight. The Manlius Town Council chose to put swan shaped wire with white christmas tree lights on EVERY telephone pole within the entire town.

Fayetteville Town Council members were shocked and had no idea how to retaliate.

Manlius residents developed a sense of pride. They even discussed rubbing the Swan-Factor in the face of all non-residents further by changing the name of the town to Swanlius. Everything appeared to be going amazing for the town of Manlius. … …….

Until tragedy struck, Tuesday, August 22, 2006. A towns infinate sorrows met with 12 fire trucks from a reported five fire stations. Police from across the state shut down all town roadways. A state of emergency was declared for the greater Syracuse Area.